DVD Review: All The Vermeers In New York (D+)

All The Vermeers In New York (1990)
Directed by Jon Jost
Starring Emmanuelle Chaulet, Gordon Joseph Weiss and Grace Phillips
MPAA: UR
Grade: D+

Review by Bobby Nashville

I am a fan of Tom Wolfe novels (yes, I do read) and even though this is not based on his work it seemed to have a lot of the elements of a Tom Wolfe piece. So, I was willing to give this a shot. In my mind it had all the right elements: the New York financial world of the 80's, the back biting art scene and a French actress that isn't really sure what it is that she wants. Sounds like a great art film right there: add a good script, some decent cinematography and in my mind, All The Vermeers In New York should have been halfway there. I repeat: should have been.

When you take a hard look at All The Vermeers In New York, it simply is a potentially good movie that just does not add up to the sum of its parts. Gordon Joseph Weiss does a very good job of keeping All The Vermeers afloat through some solid acting (especially the scenes where he is moving block trades at his brokerage house). But frankly every one else in the movie seems to be on ludes or something. The dialogue is uneven and at times you wonder if the actors have actually forgotten their lines. Anna (Emmanuelle Chaulet) and Gordon (Gordon Joseph Weiss) don't seem to spark the chemistry needed to make their relationship that interesting or at the very least, believable.

Their are several attempts at scenes purely for art's sake: airplanes cutting through the sky, wandering cameras through lobbies of a museum, etc., all set to classical or jazz music. At first it seems interesting but an hour into the movie it really becomes boring. I get it, it's a painting on film, but does it have to be this boring?

If you are looking a good art film then skip the boring All The Vermeers In New York and opt for a good Jim Jarmusch flick (Down By Law, Stranger Than Fiction, Mystery Train) instead.

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